There is good evidence that certain kinds of social structures are inherently demeaning to both genders.

Consider first that many of the most objectionably hierarchical and authoritarian societies are also the ones that treat women the most unequally. This has a kind of logic to it.  It involves throwing a sop to the great majority of men at the bottom of the power-and-
prestige scale, by proclaiming all males vastly superior to all females—and by this gesture, allowing them to compensate for their lowly status by lording it over their womenfolk. 

At its root, this custom is not terribly different from the situation that once prevailed in the American South, where impoverished whites got to feel like "somebody" by having even more impoverished blacks to feel superior to.

What about violence toward women?   There is a stereotypical sort of man who gets yelled at by his boss, then goes home and kicks his dog.  Is it that much of a leap to go from kicking your dog to hitting your mate?

It certainly doesn't seem unreasonable to suggest that men who feel demeaned themselves may be more likely to demean their women through abuse.  There is also a fairly widely recognized correlation between domestic violence and a compulsion to control.  Would it be all that outlandish to suggest that in men, a lack of normal control over one’s destiny can lead to low self-esteem, as well as to an obsession with achieving control somewhere, which can then both find expression in the form of domestic violence?

I should stress that my reason for raising this subject is not to excuse anybody's behavior.  In any particular case, domestic abuse needs to be handled with firmness, not social theories.  But if there are forces that, in the aggregate, tend to exacerbate such violence, wouldn't it be only prudent for both sexes to try to comprehend these?