For years I’ve prayed on my knees, because that’s what I was taught was the appropriate thing to do.  More recently, though, my knees have been giving me some pain and other forms of trouble, so I’ve started saying my prayers standing up.  I’ve figured that considering my limitations, God wouldn’t mind—and I’m happy to report that (to date, at least) I haven’t been struck by any lightning bolts.

Another, more recent way I’ve changed how I pray is to lose the attitude of perpetual timid repentance and self-abasement that I once believed was necessary and appropriate, even when I hadn’t done anything especially bad.

Why?  Well, to begin with, based on the surviving documents that describe him, I think it sounds totally out of character for Jesus to have wanted anyone to bow and scrape in this manner.  He’s the guy who washed other people’s feet, remember?

What seems more probable to me is that, like the priestly classes of many religions, the so-called “Christian” clergy were the ones who thought up this purported requirement of sucking up.

Why would they have done this? Well, maybe the claim of being officially-authorized representatives of God made them feel entitled to a bit of deference, too.  (After all, everyone knows you don’t want to piss off the big boss’ right-hand man.  And hey, even with the best of intentions, how could anyone who habitually has their ring kissed by people on their knees avoid feeling that, like God the Father, they too, are of at least somewhat-exalted status?)

I also wouldn’t be surprised to discover that portrayals of God as first and foremost an intimidating being were conjured up by medieval clergymen who came from aristocratic families, and because of primogeniture, had no wealth or power of their own.  Under the fearsome-God model, they had an opportunity to limit the extent to which their older brothers felt comfortable lording it over them.

In fact, rather than being considered simply non-entities, these younger-brother priests could project an image of having a long-lasting and closer connection to the ultimate power source, the King of Kings, while their older brothers reigned for only a relatively short time—followed by an eternity in which, if they had thumbed their noses just a bit too much at the brook-no-nonsense Authority of the Universe, they could be as tormented (and perhaps more critically, debased) as the lowest of petty criminals.

Considering all this, I now feel it’s appropriate to express a lot more simple, positive energy in prayer.  I’m motivated by wanting to be like God, in the sense of trying to be worthy of becoming part of him/them—just like all the other souls who seem to have done the same thing, and thereby increased the total God-mass (or reach, or presence, or whatever you want to call it).  What’s disrespectful about that?

Or to put it another way, at this stage of my life, I feel like I just want to try out for the team, and I’m asking the coach for some pointers on what it takes to be accepted.  Who needs to put their tail between their legs to ask for something like that?  Positive energy seems like a lot more appropriate way to approach the challenge than endless groveling—especially if the penitence is ultimately rooted in nothing more than trying to avoid punishment.